NyosBrik!

(hedlayn bukas ngayon ang sulat)

On the eve of Sibuyas' birthday, she was given the chance to have a one on one interview with one of the sought-after talkshow hosts in America.

The Ellen Degeneres show.
Live via satellite.


Ellen degeneres: Oh my, i cant believe i'm with Sibuyas (Seybooh-yeys) right now. How was the trip?

Sibuyas: Hi ellen. The trip was ok. I took the Ferrari Avanti II and as far as turboprop aircraft is concern, it brought me here in about 8 hours more so-so.

Ellen: whoa, your trip goin here was faster than the speed of light! not to mention, you came all the way from the Philippines.

Sibuyas: (Chuckles) oh Ellen, you are so funny. That was not speedy at all. If I only have a cheetah pet then I would've rode on it instead of that crappy ferrari aircraft.

Ellen: haha, i was just kiddin Seyboohyeys. anyway, another year has passed and another year was added on your summers-young escapades, do you think this is the best year for you so far?

Sibuyas: Hmm.. that's a very good question. (long pause)

Ellen: yes?

Sibuyas: yes. (all smiles)

Ellen: oh, ok.. *chuckles* that's good to hear Seyboohyeys. and since you are here I would like to hear your opinion about the republicans and democrats. I know you love politics. Will Barack Obama make it?

Sibuyas: Make what?

Ellen: oh Seyboohyeys you know what I mean.

Sibuyas: oh. Yeah. haha. yeah. well yes cmon and make it, make it. make it. (Tangenang Ellen to, nauubusan na ko ng ingles)

Ellen: alright, so that's a confirmation from you? Obama will make it big time.

Sibuyas: (Ano daw?! big time? dba tsokolate yun? tangenang yan naman o.) Yeah.

Ellen: hmm..your answer is quite vague but i'll take it as a yes. Seyboohyeys, according to sources, you have Alexithymia? how true is this?

Sibuyas: Haa?! uh, i mean huh?

Ellen: yeah, they said that you were diagnosed having an Alexithymia. Because your Amygdala, which literally means almond and is a part of your limbic system under your thalamus is damaged? and if it is damaged, then it means, you have difficulty in expressing your emotions. is that true?

Sibuyas: *dead air*

Ellen: and it is also rumored that you have hypophagia? so this means that your hypothalamus is not functioning properly too? the hypothalamus is also a part of your limbic system right? the hypothalamus controls your eating, sleeping and sexual activities.. so if this is the case, you have problems in your mounting behavior? look, if you try to put an electric stimulator on your hypothalamus, then probably there's a high chance of gaining back your damaged limbic resilience? well believe it or not Seyboohyeys, this has been tested on rats. and it was a succesful experiment.
I mean, come to think of it, the only part that has not been damaged on your limbic system is your hippocampus.
well that's obvious because as i can see, you do not have any memory problem.. like you know, you dont have amnesia or alzheimer's.

Sibuyas: uh, yes..

Ellen: and oh, im just so glad to know that your hindbrain is not affected nor damaged. because if so, oh my! your cerebellum would have been at cost too. imagine you having a propulsion or retropulsion?! jeez seyboohyeys,i might probably think you wont be able to live a normal life. and worst, you might have Ataxia or dystaxia.

Sibuyas: huwat?! huwat's that?!

Ellen: oh my god, you dont know what's retropulsion, ataxia and dystaxia? retropulsion is the tendency to step backwards if bumped from the front or upon initiating walking, usually seen in people who tend to lean backwards because of problems with balance. this is usually because of certain problems that might occur in your cerebellum. and of course cerebellum is located in your hindbrain. It controls your motor coordination. and Ataxia-
Sibuyas? Sibuyas?

i-is that blood? comin out from your nose?
(nilapitan ako at niyugyog, binigyan ako ng panyo)

oh my god, sibuyas what's happening to you?! your nose is bleeding..

Sibuyas: please... please stop..

Ellen: what do you mean stop? oh please use the hankie and wipe your nose. and so moving forward-

Sibuyas: ellen..

Ellen: yes?

Sibuyas: tantanan mo na koooooooooo!! noooooooo nooooooo

...at naramdaman kong may sumampal saken ng ubod-lakas.

Mamita: hoy bangon! ano ba yan, binabangungot ka adik ka ba iha?! o, baket dinudugo ilong mo?! may sakit ka ba?! may nde ka ba sinasabe samen? punasan mo yan.. gusto mo ba ng tubig?

Sibuyas: nde ho.. ok lang po ako.. (hinihingal parin.. nakahiga sa kama.) pinunasan ang duguang ilong..

Mamita: O,happy birthday sayo.. bumangon ka na dian at magsimba. magpasalamat ka sa Panginoon at ikaw ay buhay pa. dali na!

Sibuyas: Opo.. (langya walastik tlga maglambing tong tundra-mudra na to.)


Tangenang Ellen yan.
Pinasasakit niya ulo ko sa mismong kaarawan ko.

Hafi bertdi to myselp.
Tumanda nnmn ako.
Baket ba iseneselebreyt ang kapanganakan taon-taon?
ah alam ko ang sagot,
kasi hindi ito iseneselebreyt buwan-buwan.

hahahahahahahahahahaha tangena alam ko korni.
pagbigyan mo na ako, bertdi ko naman. ngayon lang to.

at dahil bertdi ko, ako'y magsuswimming sa weekend. o sama ka ba bawang?! yooohooo!